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magazine / nd07

November/December 2007 issue


EXPLORER
 


Powder Trip (page 2)

On Prune Pickers Pass, a boarder cut me off as I sped downhill. He was standing off to one side, then he slid right across my path to join his baked buddies, like stepping into speeding traffic without a glance. I veered sharply to avoid knocking him over, but if I had chosen to deliver a Gordie Howe elbow, he'd still be seeing stars.

Another beef: novice boarders scrape the best snow off steep hills; you can actually hear the damage. Afraid to turn or carve but wanting to look cool, they slide down with their boards parallel to the hill, digging in instead of pointing the board straight down. It's like taking a shovel to it. After a few hours of this, the slope is laid open, dark wounds among the moguls.

MAP: STEVEN FICK/CANADIAN GEOGRAPHIC
Click map to enlarge
On the chairlift, I grew morose. Young people, including my nephews in Canmore, are taking up boards and boards only. Skis are going to be history in a decade or two, with everyone happily shredding on boards. I have big fun on skis, but I'm circling the drain — I'm going the way of the dodo and the eight-track.

When I start asking people their opinion on snowboards versus skis, it is like tapping into a violent wellspring.



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But Monday was different. Monday was gangs of snowboarders. Monday was acne and attitude and dreads and MC Hammer pants rippling in the breeze.

"My daughter was hit three times on one vacation and all by boarders!" says my friend Paula Thomas in Fredericton.

"One hit her so hard, he sheared the bindings right off her skis! I was amazed her legs weren't broken.

"I saw three boarders get off the lift, and they fell in a heap. One got knocked out by the chair hitting him in the head. The lift operator ran to help but forgot to switch off the lift, and he got hit and was also knocked out. A skier then hit the red button and called for help. I was next; it was like watching a Marx Brothers skit!"

"Monday!" says a friend in Banff.

"They're up there on Monday because they're all unemployed bums."

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